Boston is. NYC is.

That's a hugely important article. I think it deflates a lot of Jacobs' prescriptions, down to her emphasis on in-the-street empiricism.
 
The Toby urban plan: cheap housing, cheap beer and free art supplies.
 
They've been trying cheap housing and cheap beer in Buffalo and Detroit for awhile. Are the art supplies the missing ingredient?
 
I guess its my shorthand for patronage for struggling artists. I keep thinking about all the WPA painters. $50 million a year in artist welfare subsidies would do a lot for the city in the long run.
 
Check out this NYC douchebag!

36379_948486004289_810209_52401969_7074187_n.jpg


Ugly fucking shirt!
 
Not one of the Onion's stronger pieces IMHO, but it seems to be flying around the web for some reason.

8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live
'We're Getting The Hell Out Of This Sewer,' Entire Populace Reports

September 2, 2010 | ISSUE 46?35



NEW YORK?At 4:32 p.m. Tuesday, every single resident of New York City decided to evacuate the famed metropolis, having realizing it was nothing more than a massive, trash-ridden hellhole that slowly sucks the life out of every one of its inhabitants.

With audible murmurs of "This is no way to live," "What the hell am I doing here?I hate it here," and "Fuck this place. Fuck this horrible place," all 8.4 million citizens in each of the five boroughs packed up their belongings and told reporters they would rather blow their brains out with a shotgun than spend another waking moment in this festering cesspool of filth and scum and sadness.

By 5:15 p.m. there was gridlock traffic on the outbound sides of the Holland and Lincoln tunnels, and the area's three major airports were flooded with New Yorkers, all of whom said they wanted to go anyplace where the pressure of 20 million tons of concrete wasn't constantly suffocating them.

"I always had this perverted sense of pride because I was managing to scrape by here," said Brooklyn resident Andrew McQuade, who, after watching two subway rats gnawing on a third bloody rat carcass, finally determined that New York City was a giant sprawling cancer. "Well, fuck that. I don't need to pay $2,000 a month to share a doghouse-sized apartment with some random Craigslist dipshit to prove my worth. I want to live like a goddamn human being."

"You see this?" added McQuade, pointing at a real estate listing for a duplex in Hagerstown, MD. "Two bedrooms, two baths, a den?a fucking den?and a patio. Twelve hundred a month. That's total, not per person."

According to residents, the mass exodus was triggered by a number of normal, everyday New York City events. For Erin Caldwell of Manhattan, an endlessly honking car horn sent her over the edge, causing her to go into a blind rage and scream "shut up!" at the vehicle as loud as she could until her voice went hoarse; for Danny Tremba of Queens it was being cursed at for walking too slow; and for Paul Ogden, also of Queens, it was his overreaction to somebody walking too slow.

Other incidents that prompted citizens to pick up and leave included the sight of garbage bags stacked 5 feet high on the sidewalk; the realization that being alone among millions of anonymous people is actually quite horrifying; a blaring siren that droned on and fucking on; muddy, refuse-filled puddles that have inexplicably not dried in three years; the thought of growing into a person whose meanness and cynicism is cloaked in a kind of holier-than-thou brand of sarcasm that the rest of the world finds nauseating; and all the goddamn people.

In addition, 3 million New Yorkers reportedly left the city because they realized the phrase "Only in New York" is actually just a defense mechanism used to convince themselves that seeing a naked man take a shit on a park bench is somehow endearing, or part of some shared cultural experience.

"I was sitting on my stoop, drinking coffee, and out of nowhere this crazy-looking woman just starts screaming, 'I am inside all of you,' over and over," Bronx resident Sarah Perez, 37, said. "Then, we both had this moment where we looked at each other and realized, okay, we have to get out of here."

"This place sucks," Manhattan resident Woody Allen, 74, told reporters. "It just fucking sucks."

When fleeing New Yorkers were asked if they would miss the city's iconic landmarks, most responded that Central Park is just a pathetic excuse for experiencing actual nature, that the Brooklyn Bridge is great but it's just a fucking bridge, that nobody goes to the Met anyway, and that living in a dingy, grime-caked apartment while exhaust fumes from an idling truck seep through your bedroom window isn't worth slightly bigger bagels.

"This is no place to raise a kid, that's for sure," said 32-year-old Brandon Rushing, a lifelong New Yorker. "I grew up here and I turned into a giant asshole. Why would I want that for my son?"

"Plus, we're the place most likely to get nuked by a dirty bomb in a terrorist attack," he added. "So that's great. Also, it smells like shit here, and I'm not exaggerating. You'll just be walking around and it starts smelling like human shit, and it just fills your nostrils and you breathe in shit for like 20 seconds."

Before departing by private helicopter, Mayor Michael Bloomberg spoke with members of the media to address the situation.

"You know what the greatest city in the world is?" Bloomberg asked reporters. "Scottsdale, Arizona. It's clean, it's not too big, it's got a couple streets with shops and restaurants, and the people there aren't fucking insane. This place is fucking insane. And by the way, that's not a reason to like it. Anyone who says that is a delusional dirtbag."

By Tuesday night, New York was completely abandoned. At press time, however, some 10 million Los Angeles?area residents, tired of their self-centered, laid-back culture and lack of four distinct seasons, and yearning for the hustle and bustle of East Coast life, had already begun repopulating the city.
Click to expand...
 
the phrase "Only in New York" is actually just a defense mechanism used to convince themselves that seeing a naked man take a shit on a park bench is somehow endearing, or part of some shared cultural experience.
Click to expand...

This part rings true. Made me laugh.
 
Not much about anything, but I found out something about Manhattan that I didn't know before.

"Canal Street" is named such because ... they were going to dig a canal between the Hudson River and the East River along what was a natural spring. Much of it (70 acres?) was already marsh land.

Once they dug it, people started building on either side of it but soon their basements were all flooded so the city eventually covered it back over. There are rumors that the spring still flows, below.

I found out about it when taking a tour of the "Between Here and There : Passages in Contemporary Photography" exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, in New York City. I didn't find the show to be very exciting but worth walking through if you're already there.

Here's a photo by Matthew Buckingham imagining what (current day) Canal Street would look like it had been turned into a "Venetian canal".

buckingham8-12-1.jpg
 
Whereas our Canal Street was the endpoint of the Middlesex Canal, something made obsolete by the Boston & Lowell Railroad that came along a couple decades later.
 
Screen-shot-2010-09-05-at-12.50.44-AM.png


The New York chapter of the American Institute of Architects (AIA) and the Center for Architecture Foundation have been co-hosting an exhibit entitled "Our Cities, Ourselves: The Future of Transportation in Urban Life". It continues through 11 September.

I checked it out, yesterday. It was fairly interesting. Most of the exhibit is accessible online so you're not missing much if you can't make the trip.

Here's a brief synopsis of the exhibit:

Our Cities Ourselves: The Future of Transportation in Urban Life explores the creation of better cities through better transportation and demonstrates what is possible when we design our cities for ourselves ...

... Our Cities Ourselves envisions sustainable urban futures for ten major global cities: Ahmedabad, Budapest, Buenos Aires, Dar es Salaam, Guangzhou, Jakarta, Johannesburg, Mexico City, New York City and Rio de Janeiro. In each city, ITDP field offices and international architects propose ideal transportation futures grounded in current conditions.
Click to expand...

The exhibit is made up of panels of photos of how a neighborhood in each city looks today along with drawings of how they might look twenty years from now, with new transportation options (and a lot of landscaping) in place.

So, if you're still reading this, I came away from the exhibit with five thoughts on cities and transportation.

1) Nine of the ten cities in the exhibit are at latitudes (longitudes?) where the weather is almost always moderate. New York City is the only city, I think, that has snow every winter. I don't think weather gets enough attention when people discuss transportation. It seemed as though every one of the panels had people biking along paths in their shorts, children playing in parks, and three-wheeled, door-less pedicabs. That's all well and good except for the months of December, January, February, and March.

Yes, some people ride bikes in winter. Mostly, for transportation, not for enjoyment. Cold climates have different needs than warm-weather cities.

2) What the hell is this obsession with three-wheeled, door-less pedicabs?? Either man-powered, by electric or by gas, it seems this is the future of transportation. Maybe, although my experiences in Boston and New York City are that they don't work well, mainly due to cost. Although the drivers say that they work for tips and that there's no set fare, they won't take you anywhere unless it's worth $15 or more. This isn't practical for many people. And, in traffic, you can probably walk as fast.

3) Boston got screwed with the Silver Line. Yeah, we all say that, but time and again I'm reminded of this fact. To see what other cities have done with BRT makes me almost weep (no, seriously). It's tragic. The Silver Line should have been the START of something great in the city but instead I think it will be the start AND END of BRTs. I like how the Silver Line seems to have improved in frequency between Dudley Square and South Station, but I don't it works, otherwise.

4) Many of the proposals for the different cities involved revitalizing run-down neighborhoods ("slums") not improving already-existing areas. So, basically a clean slate. (NYC was the exception of this; the proposal was for the area around the base of the Brooklyn Bridge, Manhattan-side. It's a sloppy mess right now but it's not a decrepit hole in the ground.) So, the proposals are of limited, practical use - I don't know how transferable their ideas are to other neighborhoods.

5) Congestion in downtown neighborhoods in cities such as New York and Boston is, to a large part, caused by the movement of goods. "Food, fuel, clothing come in, garbage goes out ..." as a handout describes it. Things come to a standstill on my street by garbage trucks, by the UPS guy (gal, actually), by the delivery truck to the corner store. (The other big slow-down is caused by valet parking, but I digress ...)

Last night I was walking down 8th Avenue in Chelsea (NYC). I walked by one of the 95 drug stores in the neighborhood (only out-numbered by the Thai and sushi places ...). A delivery truck had parked in the right-hand lane - which has now been designated as a bikers-only lane. So, it was great that it wasn't blocking traffic but it mean the bikers (of which there were many) had to swerve into the street to go around it.

Thanks, asshole!

Finally, here are "10 Principles for Sustainable Transport".

1. Walk the walk: Create great pedestrian environments

2. Powered by people: Create a great environment for bicycles and other non-motorized vehicles

3. Get on the bus: Provide great, cost-effective public transport

4. Cruise control: Provide access for clean passenger vehicles at safe speeds and in significantly reduced numbers

5. Deliver the goods: Service the city in the cleanest and safest manner.

6. Mix it up: Mix people and activities, buildings and spaces.

7. Fill it in: Build dense, people and transit oriented urban districts that are desirable.

8. Get real: Preserve and enhance the local, natural, cultural, social and historical assets.

9. Connect the blocks: Make walking trips more direct, interesting and productive with small-size, permeable buildings and blocks.

10. Make it last: Build for the long term. Sustainable cities bridge generations. They are memorable, malleable, built from quality materials, and well maintained.
 
Nine of the ten cities in the exhibit are at latitudes (longitudes?) where the weather is almost always moderate. New York City is the only city, I think, that has snow every winter.
Click to expand...

Budapest is quite a bit north of New York City and, I suspect, has similar if not colder weather.
 
So I was in NYC over the weekend...I thought it was important that I share the beautiful scenery with everybody..

60014_817214772936_5501287_45046197_6552330_n.jpg
 
...Because that never happens in Boston. Oh wait, I see that exact scene once or twice a week.

(it's so cute when a Masshole hates on NYC)
 
Nine of the ten cities in the exhibit are at latitudes (longitudes?) where the weather is almost always moderate. New York City is the only city, I think, that has snow every winter.
Click to expand...

Bike planners and the like in Copenhagen in particular have put a lot of thought into this climate issue. I'm not sure I'm really convinced by any of their arguments - they all seem like a variation on "it's cold here, but we still promoted cycling and it worked!" Maybe the snowfall totals there are less; that seems like it would put a bigger damper on bikes than just the cold.

I think there needs to be more creative thought put into the issue. How about little snowmobile taxis, for instance? Is there a cultural bias against these things because they're favored by certain ex-Alaskan governors' spouses?

The Silver Line should have been the START of something great in the city but instead I think it will be the start AND END of BRTs.
Click to expand...

Good, RIP forever. BRT is awesome for cash strapped third world countries struggling to build decent transit systems. Here in Boston, we have the money for trains, we just choose to spend it building obscenely expensive highway tunnels and widening 128. This is the real issue.

...Because that never happens in Boston. Oh wait, I see that exact scene once or twice a week.
Click to expand...

It's true there's no trash rotting in the streets of the Back Bay and South End, where there are service alleys to deal with the problem, but virtually everywhere else in the Boston metro has to content with the stench. Any side street in Cambridge is vile-smelling on garbage day. It's merely a function of lower density that we don't see mountain ranges of plastic bags on the sidewalks, but it doesn't seem to take away from the smell.
 
armpitsOFmight said:
take a pic and prove it!!!
Click to expand...

So you're leading to me to believe that either 1) you've never left the tony confines of the Back Bay, or 2) you're a liar and you're not that bright.

Welcome to Monday mornings in Brighton.... our shit stinks as much as NYC's, and the fact that I have to say this aloud to you is idiotic. NY's a great place, Boston's a great place, huzzah.

4987966164_a265caf935_b.jpg


4987966984_89bec581e8_b.jpg


4987965250_1ba30a7f3b_b.jpg


4987967568_f238a547b5_b.jpg


Now please go back into hibernation. The past month or so without you has been nice.
 
^^^That's not the same thing buttmunch!! Where's the mountain of garbage bags?? All I see in your pics is trash organized for the garbage men to pick them up. Sorry, but you need to try a little harder.
 
armpitsOFmight said:
^^^That's not the same thing buttmunch!! Where's the mountain of garbage bags?? All I see in your pics is trash organized for the garbage men to pick them up. Sorry, but you need to try a little harder.
Click to expand...

Please visit Chinatown, Boston. Or better yet, find Charlestown or East Boston the day before trash pick up.

Also, in proportion to the population density between those two areas (that place in NYC and Brighton), the garbage pile is probably the exact same proportion. Please try to think of why there might be a bigger pile in NYC then just randomly take a snapshot.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top