Please stop.

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MrDee12345

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@moderators you really think this comment is fine but taking issue with it is grounds for deletion and threats of being banned? Absolutely ridiculous the double standards here are glaring. This is the second time vanshookenraggen has intervened after XEC posted something extremely reactionary or racist without doing anything about that and threatening to ban me for responding to it. Do other mods agree with this? I Cannot find a list of mods anywhere and feel obligated to make this public. View attachment 18122
There is nothing trolling about calling a comment that writes off a whole group of people (who are part of urban life) as hostile to it fascist. That is a fascistic idea. There was also quite a lot more substantive and good natured engagement with other peoples comments in my comment (I also responded to several other people) than there has been from several people in this thread who have received no pushback from the mods. This is clearly a hostile environment for anyone who isn't comfortable with constant racist dogwhistles and tough on crime rhetoric and I increasingly have no interest in participating in this community anymore despite it covering a lot of things i care about in this city. If you want this to not be a racist cess pit there is a lot of work to do but clearly a lot of you are fine with it and consistently take more issue with calling it out.
I get it. You've learned the bits about "social justice" and racism that we should have learned in school, but didn't, and now you've taken it upon yourself to educate us older and supposedly ignorant fools on all of the new stuff you've learned. Great. But as someone has conducted intercultural discussions outside in various forms outside of the US, you're not going to convince people they're wrong by calling them "fascists" or "racists." You're going to find that this board has a lot of people who come from a vast array of backgrounds - some obviously know A LOT about architecture, some don't but still like to engage and others like to look at the pretty pictures of new buildings and read what the experts have to say about them. I'm clearly in the latter group.

Just dial it back a bit and take it easy with the name calling. You can strongly disagree with people without giving them pejorative labels, that in most cases don't apply (and in many cases you seem to not know the meaning of). Just chill and chat and let's try to continue having good discussions about the city we all love.
 
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Blackbird

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But as someone has conducted intercultural discussions outside in various forms outside of the US, you're not going to convince people they're wrong by calling them "fascists" or "racists."
Honest question: if you suspect someone may be a fascist or a racist, how would you go about convincing them that they’re wrong?

Pretty hard balance to strike between being polite enough that they won’t just throw up emotional walls and shutdown, but also forceful enough that they don’t just roll their eyes and ignore you.
 

xec

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Honest question: if you suspect someone may be a fascist or a racist, how would you go about convincing them that they’re wrong?

Pretty hard balance to strike between being polite enough that they won’t just throw up emotional walls and shutdown, but also forceful enough that they don’t just roll their eyes and ignore you.
Just like "infrastructure" has been redefined to mean "home care for the elderly" it looks like "fascist" has been redefined to mean "anyone whose circumstances and life experiences have led them to form values and opinions that are different from my own".

Language evolves and I suppose I can accept that redefinition as long as it's agreed that it is a universal definition and applies equally to everyone. So under the new definition anyone who doesn't agree 100% with everything I post here is a fascist. It works something like Newton's law of gravitation & third law of motion. Anyone who calls someone else a fascist is also fascist (with an opposing viewpoint).

So we are all fascists now.
 

jl326

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How about refraining from calling entire groups of people "hostile to urban life"? Why is that not considered name calling? It truly is stunning how the rules of decorum seem to work here: let reactionaries say whatever atrocious nonsense they want but if anyone disagrees at all forcefully that's crossing a line.

one of those reactionary trolls you seem to let run rampant is right there
How did you conclude that nm88 was directing that comment to you alone and not everyone here in general? I can speak for myself only here, but the tone in many of your posts (I repeat, tone, not talking content), such as this one above in response to a pretty innocuous post, comes off as needlessly combative to me, and thus contributing to a "hostile environment." I'm also not saying you're the only one with combative tones in your posts (I think that should go without saying, but feel the need to make that clear here lest it gets misinterpreted) - hell, I likely have a few in my history - but you also don't see if mods are also messaging others directly/privately about their posts either.
 

Blackbird

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it looks like "fascist" has been redefined to mean "anyone whose circumstances and life experiences have led them to form values and opinions that are different from my own".
No, I think it’s mostly used to define people who exhibit a lot of nationalism and who support a strong military, powerful police force, well-defended borders, and interventionalist economic policies all for the purpose of national unity, stability, and orderliness.

Generally opposed to artists, anarchists, atheists, and communists or at least those were how the sides panned out in the Spanish Civil War afaik (with the fascists eventually winning).

Not a hard thing to look up..
 
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armpitsOFmight

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No, I think it’s mostly used to define people who exhibit a lot of nationalism and who support a strong military, powerful police force, well-defended borders, and interventionalist economic policies all for the purpose of national unity, stability, and orderliness.

Generally opposed to artists, anarchists, atheists, and communists or at least those were how the sides panned out in the Spanish Civil War afaik (with the fascists eventually winning).

Not a hard thing to look up..
You did not understand XEC's post. Words are being redefined as we speak. Just look at how the oxford dictionary changed the following words because they were deemed "too sexist."
 

shmessy

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You take good pics, but I can't in good conscience give you any likes because you never give me any. You're not the only poster I feel this way about either. But they are good pics so thanks for the updates.
1640795513520.png
 

DZH22

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Please tell me this is sarcasm lmao
Absolutely not. I'm very liberal with handing out likes in general. However, I also happen to post as much (photo) content here as anybody else on the site (except maybe Beeline). If, after time, there is not one iota of reciprocation towards any of my posts, I notice that. Why wouldn't I notice that?

To be blunt, if I were to keep handing out likes to somebody who gives me 0 in return on 10x the content, then it makes me feel like some kind of cuck. If you are going to be stingy and never acknowledge people's efforts, then eventually you shouldn't expect them to acknowledge yours either. I'm also not saying it has to be the same percentage or even anywhere near the same percentage, but I definitely take note of those goose eggs and ultimately choose to give those posters the same treatment that they have given me.
 

Lrfox

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Absolutely not. I'm very liberal with handing out likes in general. However, I also happen to post as much (photo) content here as anybody else on the site (except maybe Beeline). If, after time, there is not one iota of reciprocation towards any of my posts, I notice that. Why wouldn't I notice that?

To be blunt, if I were to keep handing out likes to somebody who gives me 0 in return on 10x the content, then it makes me feel like some kind of cuck. If you are going to be stingy and never acknowledge people's efforts, then eventually you shouldn't expect them to acknowledge yours either. I'm also not saying it has to be the same percentage or even anywhere near the same percentage, but I definitely take note of those goose eggs and ultimately choose to give those posters the same treatment that they have given me.
Most of us wouldn't notice that because it's a generally meaningless function that nobody should put much stock in at all. I'm sure many users here just generally don't use the feature at all (I rarely even think of it). Most of us certainly don't put much weight in "likes" anyway. Certainly, trying to determine other users' intent behind receiving or not receiving likes is an exercise in futility. We don't all use the website the same way.

If not receiving the same amount of likes you give makes you feel like a "cuck," it's probably time to step away from the internet for a while. Again, it's a fairly meaningless feature and there's plenty of literature on how bad chasing likes is for our mental health and wellbeing. Simply put, don't put much stock in "likes." You take great pictures, but many of us (myself included) just don't think about the "like" button when scrolling through hundreds of posts per day. Don't take it personally, not getting a "like" is not a negative reflection of your photos or you as a person.
 

DZH22

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Most of us wouldn't notice that because it's a generally meaningless function that nobody should put much stock in at all. I'm sure many users here just generally don't use the feature at all (I rarely even think of it). Most of us certainly don't put much weight in "likes" anyway. Certainly, trying to determine other users' intent behind receiving or not receiving likes is an exercise in futility. We don't all use the website the same way.
The few of us who post the majority of pictures here will notice. The function was installed in order to give the recognition without peppering the forum with useless "nice pictures!" posts. Beeline probably hands out more likes than anybody else on this site, and also has the most posts.

Again, I never said it needed to be the same amount, same percentage, etc. What I said is that if you and I regularly post pictures, and I give you some likes, and you give me ZERO likes back, eventually that will sink in and I will not be liking any of your posts in the future. The key number here is ZERO.
 

shmessy

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I used to be a Mod for 17 years on a NE Patriots football forum (over 18k registered members) that included a "Dislike" button.

Let's all take a deep breath and appreciate the lack of THAT..........;)
 
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sm89

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I definitely don't give out many likes and I'm sorry if that is inadvertently mean because I definitely appreciate posts and photos by others! It's a newer feature to this forum and it never seemed important to me. I'm chiming in because even though I don't post photos myself here, this expectation is similar to what I've experienced on Instagram and why I don't use that site anymore. My followers/friends just expected likes/hearts out of obligation. That's not fun. The like button means different things to different people. I use it to acknowledge that I've read someone's reply to me or to signify that I found something funny or bad. To me, it's not a thank you to any extent and I don't look for it from others. Just my 2 cents. I do appreciate the photos everyone!
 

DZH22

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I'm chiming in because even though I don't post photos myself here....
Honestly, my comments aren't aimed at you or others like you at all. There are really 3 things that all have to happen to qualify towards what I'm talking about.
1. You put in a certain level of effort (here it is posting content, but imagine it in any area).
2. You go out of your way to praise somebody else's level of effort, repeatedly, in the same general area.
3. That person never acknowledges your efforts back. Literally zero. Not a hint that you put in the same work that they did.

If you were to start posting photos, and I gave you a bunch of likes, and you gave me literally zero (while posting probably 10x as many photos as you)... Well, I think the appropriate analogy is that you're probably the person who doesn't give a wave or nod when somebody lets you go in front of them in traffic either. It just feels like a lack of courtesy.

Just like you, I don't have to hand out likes liberally here. However, as somebody who does post a lot of content, I recognize the effort it takes to get the pictures, edit them, upload them, etc. I enjoy handing out likes for those efforts because I myself am putting in those same efforts, and the photos are a large part of what makes this site worth returning to. I also hand out likes for solid information (thanks equilibria) because, again, it's people going out of their way to add value to this site. It often takes me hours to sort through my pictures, edit them, cut (way) back on the volume, etc. So when I see good content, I also see the effort behind that content, and acknowledge that effort accordingly. When that person refuses to acknowledge any of my effort, ongoingly, then eventually the one-sidedness of it all stands out and I become stingy in turn. I don't see what the problem is to that *eventual* reaction.

Again, this is the extreme example here. The reciprocal acknowledgement level literally has to be the following for everything I have said to apply:
1640803555766.png
 

shmessy

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Like an old time Playboy subscriber - - although I value both, it would be disingenuous to claim I come here more for the literature than the pics.
 
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