So back to your point. NIMBY's are assholes.
i think you're painting with a way over-wise brush here.
i mean, hell -- some bostonians are racists (maybe more than i'd like to admit), but are ALL? are as many as the national perception? i don't think so.
some NIMBY's are certainly loons and assholes and act in the manners you've outlined, but some just have a legitimately different POV from you, me, probably most (although i doubt ALL) folks on here, depending on the project.
i know a very nice woman based in brighton who is not in any way like shirley, doesn't oppose everything just for the sake of opposing it, or even for some desire to maintain her own property's value (in fact, some of the local developments she's been wary of have no doubt increased the value of her condo).
by the same token, some of the friends of the friends of the public garden may be out-of-touch, self-centered "assholes," but some are just like the groups in NYC who are beginning to be concerned about shadows on central park. the public garden is a valuable asset to the city and they're (in their mind, anyway -- some of them) being good and conscientious citizens of boston to make sure it's protected.
it's a shame there were no powerful "friends of the west end" way back when.
don't get me wrong -- i'm, generally speaking, pretty pro-development and even pro-height, but the generalizations you're using to describe EVERY single NIMBY is no more just or reasonable than some of the dubmityass generalizations some of them make about people and groups trying to build in boston.